Chuck's Military Discharge

I was medically discharged from the U.S. Army after being told I was unfit for Combat Duty.
This hurt more than anything I can ever describe.
I had found a home along with others like myself.

I am not sure you can or will be able to understand me or the many men like me.
I was a professional solider.
I enjoyed the moving every three or so years.
My family was able to travel and see the world for free.

I didn’t go to the Towns State Side ( Towns in the United States ); there were to many people in there that hated us, their suppliers of freedom.
I could get anything I needed for my family there on Base ( Military location) -- we were a town within itself.

I was not to concerned about the nightmares at first, for when I spoke of them to my military friends, they to were in my same situation.
We quieted them with Booze.
I would normally drink a couple at the NCO Club at noon chow ( midday meal ). Then upon arriving home the first thing was to go to the refrigerator and pop a top ( open a beer ) even before saying anything to my wife.

My children were afraid to touch me while I was sleeping.
I made their life a living hell.
I did not do this on purpose, but out of not being able to understand I needed help.

Over twenty years without help.
Everyday, pain from wounds received in combat and service to my country.
My thoughts going back without control to combat, [Flashbacks].

I would be working and I would have a flashback, not knowing what was happening around me, only in my mind being back in the jungle in dire danger.

I couldn’t go to the Veterans Hospital for fear of being put in a rubber room. I stumbled through life with no help from anyone but my wife.
It is hard to explain to you how you're in such a state of mind to where you can not trust anyone.
It all goes back to 'Nam', the faith you had in the man next to you was a faith of survival.
For like you he to wanted to go back to the Land of the Big PX ( Military store kinda like Kmart or Wal-Mart ) .
You knew you were both fighting to stay alive, not to set a country free from communism.

So many of the films show the American Soldier as a pot smoking fool.
This is not true.
Oh I grant you it might have gone on but I am 56 years old and have never had any type of drugs into my body except what was prescribed by my doctor.

It is hard to explain to you how you cry out for help, but there is none to be had.
Every time you go for care at your local VA Office, you have to prove what you say is true.
Even with gunshot wounds you have to prove they were received in line of duty.